In Or Out Of The Box?

Deborah L. Wade Photography

​What kind of person am I? Am I the kind that thinks, works, lives inside the Box of Life or am I the kind of person that pushes beyond standardized boundaries and parameters (perhaps also known as limitations)? Am I not one or other but, like most people, a combination of the two?

Over the past few days, while I seriously bogged myself down with questioning thoughts about how I am currently trying to accomplish a variety of different life goals, I realized I may be a more 'out of the box' kind of person than I ever initially thought.

Let me bring you up to speed on what's been going on since my last post.

Two weeks ago, I interviewed for two different jobs. Both the interviews went well, with lengthy and thoughtful answers to questions and a good amount of laughter mixed in as well. Both jobs would have offered me a chance to spread my wings in new directions while effectively utilizing all the experience, talents and skills I've built up over the years. Both indicated that a final decision would be made within a couple of days. Now that an entirely new week has come and gone, I think it’s pretty obvious that I didn’t get either job. I guess there was someone else out there who was better suited than myself. 

And then, to top it all off, I still have yet to hear anything back from the two publishers I sent my memoir manuscript to (bad grammar, I know). I followed up, twice, with voicemails and emails. What did I get in return? Zip, zilch, nada, which baffles me as they were both so keen and enthusiastic earlier in October. I know I'm not the only author out there who is trying to secure a publisher, and they likely have lots and lots of submissions to consider, but I've spoken directly to them (face-to-face and screen-to-screen) and still all I get is absolute silence.

In a need to get away, and work on my overall perspective on life, I flew over to Vancouver Island for a few days to hang out with a girlfriend. Admittedly, I was a bit of a feisty bear for the first forty-eight hours, venting my frustration and rage, along with a lot of less than lady-like curse words. Then anger gave way to deflation, with me questioning everything in my life. Why am I writing this book? Why won't interested publishers respond? Why won't a potential employer recognize the skills and talents I bring to the table?

Throughout all of this, I realized, I was waiting for a response from other people. While I'm chomping at the bit to get this memoir of mine published, and get myself out there in front of people to talk about and share what I learned from my life experience (oh yes, and earn a paycheque), I'm left drumming my fingers on the desk, waiting with bated breath for someone else to initiate the next move. Although sick and tired of this particular situation, what could I actually do about it?

Then, thanks to a girlfriend of the girlfriend with whom I was staying, a totally unexpected brainstorming session took place. These two ladies filled my mind to the brim (and plenty of journal pages) with all sorts of possible answers and solutions and strategies for relying less on other people and relying more upon myself. They gave me examples of how I can think outside the box and still achieve my goals (perhaps even more successfully than when thinking inside the box!). The long and short was I flew back home yesterday with renewed determination and focus, ready to take control once again of my dreams and goals, and put myself back into the driver seat of my own life. 

Years ago, while sailing across the Pacific, I had a t-shirt that stated boldly, but in a cute way, You Are Not The Boss Of Me! I'm happy to admit those words still ring true today.

** UPDATE  **  Moments after posting this blog, I received an incredibly heart-warming telephone call from one of my interviewers. Although they did go with someone else who had more direct experience for that particular job, I was told that I made a solid impression with them and that I have a skillset that could be beneficial to the organization. They are hopeful of opportunities to work together in the future, just in a more suitable manner.  

So, there you go!

Life is rosy once again.

Deborah L. Wade Photography